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“Dead Air”

I thought of a number

Belonging to one long gone

Pressed in that sequence

But the answer I received was none

 

A long ago memory

Still can’t let it go

Emotions still buzzing

Desires still warm

 

Scorned by an action

Impossible to retrieve

A case of bad judgement

When faced with the facts

 

Swept up in a moment

And lusty oh it was

My veins filled to capacity

Throbbed full of blood

 

Contextualizing a single memory

Nightmare now it is

Haunted by lost affections

And what could have been

 

I dial in a number

But the operator isn’t there

Our telephones unconnected

Only my own breath do I hear

 

Lonely I am, so I embrace myself

And hold on ever so tight

Squeezing, squeezing, witness my tears a-plenty

Spill out they will all through the night

 

It’s time to recant, to fix this situation

But my chance for that has long since passed

My apology comes too late, for anything to be saved

My sincerity met with disbelief

 

And so off I go, marching alone

It’s just me against the frigid wind

My skin is so cold, my heart is so broken

And not a single soul to help my own to mend

 

Regrets: There are so many

Regrets: They are all mine

Regrets: Linger on

Regrets: Refuse to die

 

Of these torments that I’m facing

What now will I do?

How now can I go on?

What now is the use?

 

Suck it up brother, things will get better

Summation of the advice I receive

But a solution that isn’t, so onwards I mission

Without a clear destination in mind

 

Then it comes, the sound of a phone

Could that ringing be for ME?

On second thought no, for too far away is that sound

That purposeful noise means to deceive

 

But the ringing, the ringing, the ringing continues

And on my conscience it does play

So l answer my own, knowing full well

That my own voice will be the only one I’ll hear

 

Breathes: Once heavy

Breathes: Now low

Breathes: Staggered out

Breathes: Now few

 

Shared histories shattered

Shared legacies done

Shared commitments broken

Shared communication gone

 

A simple tale, about a simple choice

And how it quickly became so complex

Its’ everlasting legacy: a life full of misery

Be aware, be aware, BEWARE!

error: Copyright 2020 Christopher Little. All rights reserved.